I thought.

I don't know how I should describe the feelings but what I could say is, Yes, I do feel sad.
Things happened too much within just a week that I didn't update in my dear diary.
I shall record down what my life has became for me as lessons to learn in the future.
As you know, I'm such a clumsy and stupid one. :(

So yeah, if you follow me in Instagram or Twitter, you might know that I've finally done with my Term 5 !
YAYY. 3 months of hardworks ain't easy, but yes, it finally ended.
Presentations, assignments, assessments, courseworks, essays, articles, and etc etc of works.
But of course, finals are waiting for me after all the classes have been done.
Have to start working extra hard. I wanna pass all the subjects, I don't want to retake nor repeat. NEVER.

Hmmm, back to J again. Please forgive me to repeat the topics of him.
You can ignore this if you feel bored. Am sorry. :(

Yesh, same thing happened. Fuck myself. When I was about to blog, my mind blank. D;
Yeahh, same thing. I don't know but things always go complicated after I found out. T___T
I don't know how to describe my feelings right now, it's more than sad, more than heartache, more than everything.
Just, I would like to disappear from this world for a day. I don't want to breath the air of this earth anymore.
People are too scary to understand, like seriously.

I always wonder, why do people make promises when they know they couldn't make it?
It meant to break someone's heart isn't it?
The more he asked me to stay, the more I feel this guy is a monster.
The more he asked me not to leave, the more I feel scary.

He asked me why. I said I just don't want to continue this anymore. He rejected.
Yesh, I admit that my heart did pain when I said NO, but how could I say YES after I knew all the truth behind the story he told me?
Eh? No. He didn't even tell me any single things, is that I found out by myself.

I pushed him away hardly, real hard. He asked for reasons, and I replied, 'do not promise me any shits when you knew you can't do it.'
He said he won't failed this time, he will ignore the girl.
Who the fuck is going to trust you again you son of the bitch?
I brought out the topic after thinking for quite a period of time, he stunned and just simply replied me.

I don't know how I did that but seriously I have to admit that I'm pro in checking people's facebook messages. Lol.
But fuck, who doesn't know that the more you found out, the more the hurt is?

It's time to let go, 100%.
Not turning back anymore, I swear.