01012012 ♥

HAPPY NEW YEAR !
新年快乐哟！

很快吧，新年了。
新的一年，要过得好好的。
要很开心，很快乐，不再随便乱哭，不再为任何一个人掉下珍贵的眼泪。

无论什么事情发生都好，都应该要记得，不能让身边关心你的人担心。
人，要学会长大嘛。:)

该死的时间干嘛不等人！
一下子就5个小时过去了，好快。4.53am.
开始不习惯光阴的飞逝，还一直有着时间慢下来的憧憬。
真的是。

哦，对了！
想必大家都各自有各自度过新年前夕的节目吧？
就算只是呆在家的，没关系。新年还是要很开心哟！;)

跟你说，这次的新年前夕，还真的是很他妈的累人。
一直东计划西计划，还做好了万全的research哪里是最好倒数的地方。

一开始，是说好了要BBQ。然后因为某些原因而取消了，
没关系，另一班朋友说好要一起出来聚一聚什么的，却又莫名其妙的取消了。
好，问了问另两个朋友要去哪儿，说好要去The Curve参加倒数派对，最后还是各自玩各自的。
没关系！我还是要出去。问了问朋友要不要去Sunway Pyramid玩spray，
信息一封又一封地发了出去，回复的只有小猫几只而且还是没答案的那种。
算了，好累。Last decision，又再问了朋友去哪里倒数，说好去Movida, Sunway Giza。
Ok, 至少有了计划，还没那么的无言，岂知道最后因为交通问题而不能去。
啊！！！我不否认，当下我真的是气哭了。
很累，很累，很累，很累，很累。

最后，我跟朋友去了吃泰国餐当晚餐，然后去了Beach Cafe报仇玩spray，
在接下去喝了一点酒，最后因为胃痛取了嘛嘛档吃宵夜。
总共4rounds。哈哈。真的很累，你懂吗？！

泰国餐，好棒！但是也严重得令我长了好多好多豆豆。妈的。
我下次要带爸爸妈妈去那里吃！

Beach Cafe，第一次去那边跨年，也会是最后一次。
我发誓我不会再去那边了，好不搭。-.-
我觉得很啦啦，我不喜欢。:(
我终于报仇了！哈哈哈。射我者死！
我还遇见兵营的朋友哦！很有缘吧！;)
还有还有黄嘉仪，超久没看到她了。♥

Bangkok Town，喝酒。喝到我胃痛。啤酒，我真的不在行。D;

Rest 1，Indo Mee当宵夜。好幸福！:D
还是Asia Cafe的好吃。哈哈。
前男友每次都点那个给我吃，还会叫那个人不加蛋。回忆。

第一个祝我新年快乐的人，竟然是前男友。
很awkward，但是我是开心的。:)))
谈了许久，愧疚感涌上心头。该死。
其实真的很感谢这个人一直默默地在照顾我，要不然我真的不知道醉死在路边会变怎样。
谢谢。♥

谢谢那些祝我新年快乐的人。♥
新年，快乐。

其实原本我真的是伤心的，但是原来我发现，

跨年不用过得怎样轰轰烈烈，也可以有平平淡淡的开心。

和朋友聚在一起，就是开心的。♥

30th.

眼睛眨一眨，2011年即将结束了。
今天已经是30号了，2011年的最后一个星期五，又该怎么过呢？

其实说真的，我真的很不甘心。不甘心2011年就这么的度过了。
或许是我贪心，不知足吧。
总觉得我一直都在浪费时间，现在要回想起在即将过去的一年里做过什么有意义事情，
真的会想不起。
他妈的。

我真的不记得去年的新年倒数是怎么过的。该死的脑袋。-.-
只知道，2011年，真的发生了很多很不开心的事。

友情。
李小姐，其实我真的很想对你说一下这一番话。
被背叛的那刻，真的很痛。那心痛的感觉，是无法言喻的。
说原谅，我没资格吧，因为这根本不是原不原谅的问题。哈
再说，你也不会奢望我的原谅吧。
或许，就这样吧。
如果说后悔，我不会后悔跟你做了朋友，因为那是一种必须被珍惜缘分。
只能说，每个人的故事里一定会有这么一段不开心的经历。
要长大，就必须学着释怀。

爱情。
很痛。就像玫瑰花一样，明明知道有刺，却还硬要去捉。
最后受伤流血的也还是自己。

Des,
我忘了我为你哭了多久，我只懂我不会让那该死的心痛再回来了。

DT,
我不知道你说那句话的用意是什么。
I was scared to waste three more month of my life again.
我不知道，是我多心对号入座，还是你指的真的是我。
但如果真的是我的话，我真的很开心我摆脱你了。
我不是不知道你在我背后说我什么，我只是不想多加强调你这个人的个性是真的有问题。
哈哈。

W,
对不起。对你，是我的错。
不是你不好，是我们并不适合。


其实很多时候，人生很多遗憾，永远都只是遗憾。




我真的很害怕今年得倒数会过得不愉快。
伤心，很累。

2012年，倒数两天。

29th.

The third last day of 2011.

Wednesday night.

I got nothing to blog.#failure

What a boring post here. :(

SORRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.

Wednesday night, night market dayyyyy ! :D

Well, planned to go so called ' Pasar Malam ' with the Ah Han dai lou since last night.

Cause I wanted to buy the Uco Sesame Cakes for my mum cause she likes it.

And yeah, I wanna eat eat eat. Lol.

Since he likes to ffk people, so yeah, I texted him at about 5pm to ensure our night market plan still on.

After that I went for a nap. Tired though. :(

Guess what, I didn't get any reply from him until I finished my dinner. #wtf

Who likes to be ffk by people ? NO ONES. ;(

Called, no answer. #WHATTHEFUCK

Well, tweeted like a boss when I got mad. Grrr !

Suddenly he replied, and said that he's tired. -.-

Never mind then, even though I was pissed but still I don't want to mafan and force him to bring me.

#amgonnacursehimlikealousaiforffkmetwotimes

After a while, he saw my tweets then texted me, ' I bring you go later. '

LOL. I don't want to reply purposely cause I was so mad that time. -.-

But then he found me in Facebook, ' Can you please reply me ? '

LOLLL. I wanted to go and I already stayed home for two days!

Of course I on. -.-

*MOU GUAT HEI*

He came my house and waited for me while I was watching Bottled Passion.

AHAHAHAHA ! Funny one.

I don't care the existence of him and just watch the drama like a boss. :DDD

Met many of friends during the walk, even my NS friends too! :DD

Long time no see girl ! ;)

After night market, we went to Cheras for supper but too bad it was closed. :(

End up we had our meal at Kawana Thai Center, Kajang.

#wtfthenamesoundssohighclass

LOLLL.

It is actually just a normal mamak. -.-

Home after supper.

So lifeless recently, due to friends are having finals on the coming weekend.

What a life. :(

Bottled Passion, Tetris Battle, Yamcha, Facebook, Twitter.

Can I have somethings special ?! D;

I still don't have plan for my New Year Eve. T.T

Am gonna cry out loud if I have to pass it at home. T.T

Ours.

Taylor Swift - Ours

Elevator buttons and morning air

Stranger's silence makes me wanna take the stairs

If you were here, we'd laugh about their vacant stares

But right now, my time is theirs

Seems like there's always someone who disapproves

They'll judge it like they know about me and you

And the verdict comes from those with nothing else to do

The jury's out, but my choice is you

So don't you worry your pretty little mind

People throw rocks at things that shine

And life makes love look hard

The stakes are high, the water's rough, but this love is ours

You never know what people have up their sleeves

Ghosts from your past gonna jump out at me

Lurking in the shadows with their lip gloss smiles

But I don't care 'cause right now you're mine

And you'll say don't you worry your pretty little mind

People throw rocks at things that shine

And life makes love look hard

The stakes are high, the water's rough, but this love is ours

And it's not theirs to speculate if it's wrong and

Your hands are tough but they are where mine belong in

I'll fight their doubt and give you faith with this song for you

'Cause I love the gap between your teeth

And I love the riddles that you speak

And any snide remarks from my father about your tattoos will be ignored

'Cause my heart is yours

So don't you worry your pretty little mind

People throw rocks at things that shine

And life makes love look hard

And don't you worry your pretty little mind

People throw rocks at things that shine

But they can't take what's ours, they can't take what's ours

The stakes are high, the water's rough, but this love is ours

♥

This love is ours. :D

Me gusta!

HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! :D

First of all, the-very-must-question. AHAHA.

How did you guys celebrate your Christmas Eve and Christmas ?

It must be awesome right ? If no, what you waiting for ?

Start planning for the coming big big day of us, NEW YEAR EVE! ;D

Oh well, I would like to share how I was celebrate my Christmas Eve.

Hmmm, it is a combination of what I can remember and what my friends had told me. LOL.

Yes, I drunk that night. #wtf

It is not a good idea to spend your night with too much alcohol.

You'll miss the awesomeness of time when your bunch or love ones. :(

So yeah, plan for your night properly alright, don't be like mine. #gg

I was so unhappy on that day cause the plan was keep changing like fuck and no one could tell me the exact venue and time until the evening of 24th.

I was like so PISSED due to transportation and Ashley will be joining me and she is coming from a far distance. :(

It's not good to ask your friend to wait for you right ?

But, fucked up.

At the end, our plan had finally confirmed to held at The Opera, Sunway Pyramid.

I wanted to go G6 sooooooooooooooooo badly cause it is Saturday night people!

GOSHH, bloody one. Forget it. -.-

Was rotting around the hostel like a poor kid cause I couldn't connect to the internet by using my hostel's modem.

FUCKKKKMYLIFEEEEE.

I don't know why the fuck so bad luck I am, I just know that I need to borrow WiFi from the shops nearby. #fml

Alright, so yeah, stayed in Starbucks, Mcdonald,

and even Papparich just for their WiFi service. -.-

EMBARRASSING ME.

But still, I bought their products okay ? I'm not that so called thick-face. LOLLL.

Done prepared around 9.20pm and ex came to pick me up.

He brought me to Rain Forest Bar to meet up with his brother and had his dinner there.

Beer session before club, young people life huh? Ahaha.

Guess what ? I went club in two continuously days.

WTF. So addicted meh ? YESSS. -.-

The street in front of Sunway Pyramid was so pack with the crowded of people and also cars. ;O

Luckily I'm not driving. Hiak hiak. ;D

They were playing dry shampoo spray all the way from the entrance.

GOSHH. Of course, nobody survived from the spray attack. D;

I'm so regretted to wash my hair before went out. Wtf.

I'M GONNA REVENGE! FROM THE FALLEN. ;(

Lolll.

By the way, I wonder why there's people don't know what a shampoo spray is.

Hmmm, tell me why! -.-

Well, I remembered that I was so blur when everyone was counting down for Christmas.

It happened like so suddenly,

5 , 4 , 3 , 2 , 1

MERRY CHRISTMASSSSSSSSSSSSS !

And then the volume of music was on to the max and everyone started to drink, dance like mad. Well, included me. -.-

I saw Venice there too. But I wonder if it is real. LOL.

Effect after get drunk. :(

Reached home at 3.++am.

Hungry but got no energy to walk anymore.

It was suffer, I swear not to get drunk anymore. SWEAR.

Lastly,
MERRY CHRISTMAS PEOPLE.

Me gusta! ;D

It's Christmas Eve!

MERRY CHRISTMAS !

Where are you going to celebrate your Christmas ?

Well, let's have fun on this special day aight ! ;)

Loves. ♥

Annoyed.

Hello peeps ! I'm here to blog again. :D
Oh well, I just feel like blogging but I got no idea what to blog about.
Blah blah blah. -.-

As human, we are complicated one.
Emotions, feelings, physical, mental, and so on.
Even though they are in a form, but actually they are all the different things.
Do you get what I mean ? I hope my english not that poor. Lol.

Ex called, chatted for awhile.
I don't know, but we used to chat like every night.
I know he wants to call me like he always did last time, but it's different now.
So yeah, every time before he called, he texts in advance.

The feeling is just so different.
To a person who you can't communicate with, I don't know how to describe the speechless.
Ego ? Maybe, I don't know.

I don't know how to answer his question.
I don't know how to continue the topic that we chatted.

I can feel his purpose, yes I can.
This is annoyed, dislike.

Why he wants to be like this ?
Why so materialistic ?
Why so scary ?
Why so immature ?
Why so stubborn ?
Why don't admit that you're wrong ?
Why you don't listen to me ?
Why you say in that way ?

He changed, maybe I changed too.
I can't feel this person, he's scary.
Dislike.

I wonder, is there any mature people left in this world.


Goodnights.

我的如意狼君。

In love with this show recently.

You know why, cause I fall for him, Raymond Wong 黄浩然. :DD ♥

SOOOOOOOOOOOO HANDSOME. Lol.

Happy winter solstice !

多余。

回家后，才发现很多事情都不一样了。

回家的路不同。
家里的摆设不同。
家里附近的店面不同。
家里种的辣椒味道不同。
家里的小狗不同。
妈妈的发型不同。
爸爸电话铃声不同。
姐姐的书包不同。
妹妹的肤色不同。
弟弟用的电话也不同了。
妈的。弟弟竟然在用Iphone 4S。-.-

很多时候，不说不表示没感觉。
很尴尬。那种尴尬，真的很awkward，你懂吗？

明明一大班人坐在同一张桌子，聊的话题却各有各的。很怪。
我不懂，也不会形容那种感觉。

例如说，整桌子的人都在讨论要一起去旅行，而你却是那个被例外的人，感觉很meh meh meh咯。
很meh，很刺，也很说不出话来。
唯独能做的，就是按电话。哈

说实在我，当时我真的觉得我很多余，真的。/:

...

有时候，还真不习惯妈妈的宽容。
太久没回家了，想家了。

矛盾的自己，人生就是不完美，坎坷的路始终要走。

朋友，请坚强一些。
问题不在于能不能，而是要不要。
试着想想，颓废下去，伤的是自己，痛的是自己，贱的也是自己。
为何不振作起来让自己坚强起来呢？
这样至少让爱你的人不担心，自己也会快乐些，不是吗？
加油。



说得真容易，当自己身陷其中的时候，不知所措的还是自己。
这就是人类，犯贱的人类。


_MusicOfTheDay_

绝，是因为被伤过。

G6 @ The Gardens.

才发现原来去夜蒲也要看timing。
我一直不信邪，就觉得星期几去是见仁见智，原来我错了。

每个礼拜去一次夜蒲，这已经连续三个礼拜发生在我身上了。
惨了，我觉得我的朋友会讨厌我。:(
越来越不像自己，现在已经是一直沦陷自己的自己。

不过说真的，去了那么多次，昨天真的不错玩。
或许是timing对了吧？哈哈。

不知哪里来的豹子胆，驾车去clubbing。-.-

喜爱夜蒲，生活颠倒，一日两餐，无所事事，每天自然醒，这就是假期的生活啊！

New Year's Eve.

很浪漫的一套电影。
据说是跟Valentine's Day同一系列的电影。

星期四那天跟同学考完试后就跑去谷中城看了这套电影。
很讨厌那不可能的任务在一大早就sold out了。;(
不过这部电影还不赖！还算值回票价啦。;)

在新年前夕，每个人都有每个不同的故事，而这个故事就是New Year's Eve要带出的讯息。



这个降球仪式是每年的惯例。
负责2011年的那个负责人，为了这个案子搞得她的新年前夕过得好狼狈。
不过最后，却充满意义。♥



这个女的很讨人厌。-.-
看了我其实有想打她的冲动。哈



这个女的超会唱歌！
很可怜的她被关在电梯里很久，但是也因为如此她认识了他。

听听她唱的这首大家都耳熟能详的歌。



好听呗？:DDD


评级：4.0/5.0

好想也过个有意义的圣诞和新年前夕哦！

From heart.

It had been quite a long time I don't really blog from the bottom of heart.
Just simply update through what had happened in my life, that's it.
It's unhealthy, I mean for a blogger it's unhealthy. :(

Gonna refresh my blog again with my hearty words. Lols!
So guys, please keep on support me by reading my blog alright.
I do really appreciate the click in of everyone of you, sincerely!

Oh well, to be honest, I wasn't in a very good condition recently.
If you were my friend, surely you'll ask me, "As in what ?"
Everything, the answer is every single thing.

Feel stress, unhappy, emo, nervous, insomnia, blah blah blah.
That's why I'm keeping go for alcohol these few days. #fml

In the continuous two days, I drunk.
Mist Club and OverTime. @___@
I just don't know what to do and what happened to me.
I'm suffer. D;

I hate the feeling, but I can't express it when people ask me what's wrong.
Do you understand my feeling ?
It's just can not put into words, I can't. :(

Sad, been wondering like 736478265497126349523479 times where am I been to ?
I lost, I feel so lost.

In fact, I feel more happier to be PlingChee more than IceCream. Haha.
Crap right ?
I don't know, maybe that's the main reason, too much identity huh? Lol.

When people call me IceCream, I will react immediately now.
Already used to it huh ? Yeah, I think so. :/
But when people call me 慧芝, I was like HUH ?
Ahahahahaha. Funny right ? I feel strange to my real name! #wtf

It's tired to wear a mask for such a long time.
When can I take it off from my life ? When ?
Nobody will know the answer, even myself. Haha. Crappy again.

We found love in a hopeless place!
I hope I found love too.
Not relationship kind of love, I want some sincere love.
Just naturally from bottom of heart will do, that's enough.
I don't need any fake one, NO.
Where is it ? :(
No way I can get it, how realistic! Haha.

Guess what, I went to see HebeTien at TARC Setapak on last Saturday.



Honestly, I don't want to do this kind of fans thing anymore. Lol!
Queue for a long time, standing to wait, sweat like hell and blah blah blah.

Took Rm20 taxi fees to Kelana Jaya LRT station from my hostel, Rm2.50-1-hour-LRT to Wangsa Maju, and Rm1.00 Rapid KL bus to meet up with babe Tong.
GOSHH! Tiring. D;

Met some of friends there too. :D
Hey guys, long time no see huh! :DDD

Yeah, that's when my friend call me 慧芝 then I HUH and stunned. LOL!

After the crazy-crowded-concert, babe Tong went back with others and I was waiting for my friend to pick me up at the main entrance of TARC for about an hour.
Wtf! 1 hour you know ? Irritating one. ;(

Been chatted with Kenzo more than 1 hour while waiting. Ahaha.
He made me laugh like nobody business. ♥

Told him kinda many of the secrets which keeps on annoying me.
Thanks for comfort me like you always do. :DDD

My friends reached at about 11.15pm, we went to OverTime @ Setapak, Jalan Genting Kelang.
Hungry like fuck at that time. Had dinner there and also Starker Aromatic.
Aromatic is always my choice. Loves! ♥
At the end, I drunk. -.-

Went for pool after beer session. #fml
I wanna back homeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! D;
I hate to stay when everyone around me is smoking.
Feel like Nah! them you know. Zzz. -.-

Reached hostel at about 3.30am. Drunk!

Sunday 11/12/2011

Went for a super duper boring talk which about 'How to earn more?' blah blah something talk.
I'm not into these kind of direct sales business when I know some of my friends around me is doing it.
Well, it took me like 6 hours to stay at the annoying place where everyone is smoking again.
Fuck laa. -_____-
Thanks WengKin to accompany for about 1 hour too. :DDD

Went to Kim Gary @ Mid Valley for dinner and then 1 Utama for a midnight movie.
Magic To Win.



Hmmm, not so bad but sweat. Lol!

Don't feel like telling you more about it, just go to the cinema and catch it up okays ? Ahaha.

Rating: 2.8/5.0


Went home at about 1.45am.

Tadaaaaaa!
That's my weekend, how about yours ?
Gonna start doing revision now. Final is on tomorrow!
Wtf wtf wtf.

Bye!

The One That Got Away.

In love with this phase suddenly. ♥

Look at the lyrics carefully, it's sweet though!

The girl's version.

The One That Got Away - Katy Perry

Summer after high school when we first met

We make out in your Mustang to Radiohead

And on my 18th Birthday

We got matching tattoos

Used to steal your parents' liquor

And climb to the roof

Talk about our future

Like we had a clue

Never planned that one day

I'd be losing you

In another life

I would be your girl

We'd keep all our promises

Be us against the world

In another life

I would make you stay

So I don't have to say

You were the one that got away

The one that got away

I was June and you were my Johnny Cash

Never one without the other we made a pact

Sometimes when I miss you

I put those records on

Someone said you had your tattoo removed

Saw you downtown singing the Blues

It's time to face the music

I'm no longer your muse

But in another life

I would be your girl

We'd keep all our promises

Be us against the world

In another life

I would make you stay

So I don't have to say

You were the one that got away

The one that got away

The o-o-o-o-o-one [x3]

The one that got away

[Bridge:]

All this money can't buy me a time machine (Nooooo)

It can't replace you with a million rings (Nooooo)

I shoulda told you what you meant to me (Woooooow)

'Cause now I paid the price

In another life

I would be your girl

We'd keep all our promises

Be us against the world

In another life

I would make you stay

So I don't have to say

You were the one that got away

The one that got away

The o-o-o-o-o-one [x3]

In another life

I would make you stay

So I don't have to say

You were the one that got away

The one that got away

Let's listen to the boy's version. :D

So sweet right ?

I wish I could steal my parents' liquor and drink it with you on the roof too.

You were the one that got away.

周记。

我回来了！

各位，请告诉我你很想我。:(

最近忙到透顶。他妈的！

终于很清楚的了解到大学生活的压力，大学生活的约束真的不比平常来的差。

请别看小那些该死的assignments，分分钟把你给压死你都不知道。幹！

好吧，在这一个星期内，发生了很多事哦！

现在就来回顾回顾吧！

才发现我很过分，竟然没update关于暮光之城的帖子。;(

是的，我看了这部电影。

上映的后两天我就看了，以免落伍嘛！哈哈。

The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn Part 1

答应自己不会错过这部电影，不然我真的会去跳湖。

真的很谢谢我那很乖的grandson帮我买的票。真乖！:D

我孙子是面子书里的Grandson啦！他是我在camp认识的朋友。哈

他千里迢迢帮我去百威年买戏票，感动！哈哈。

好的，归题。

这部电影，好令人失望哦！:(

没有想象中的好看耶！是因为政府删减了很多部分的关系吗？

算了吧。只好期待协以及的大结局了。

我真的很讨厌Edward的说。

我只看到Jacob很落力的在保护Bella，而Edward却一直装作一副无能为力的样子。

讨厌死了！

评级：3/5颗星星。

头脑好乱。就从上星期五开始写吧！

星期五 02/12/2011

会计考试。时隔一年没碰过会计后，我竟然很厉害的平衡了两个户口。

哈哈

满足感爆灯哦！:DDD

晚上，就结伴与朋友去了一间没去过的夜店，G6。

不怎么好玩。-________-

星期六 03/12/2011

去了学校，把assignment快快赶完。

一待就待了一整天的星巴克。

晚上我还与同学驾车去到蒲种去吃晚餐，有够大胆的说。

在那里我遇到了当兵的朋友，好巧哦！

那种感觉真的难以形容，很开心。:DDD

逛着夜铺，还买了几件衣服。他妈的爱买。-___-

星期日 04/12/2011

又是在赶assignment。

大考快到了，假期快来了，所以要把功课全部统统做完！:D

晚上很好笑，原本也是打算到蒲种去吃晚餐，岂知大赛车，转头就走到金字塔去吃。

星期一 05/12/2011

太累，睡迟了。旷了一堂课，坏学生！:(

很纳闷，上课上到6点钟。无聊死了。

在Youtube看了部电影。哈

我觉得很好看咯。

比那些年还更清楚的带出爱情观的真实。

喜爱夜蒲

续集快出了呢！期待。:DD

说真的，陈柏宇真的好帅好帅！♥

星期二 06/12/2011

在学校就一直跟同学大谈喜爱夜蒲的剧情。哈

他们一直说是三级片。囧

这天很压力，因为得准备第二天当餐厅经理人的事务。恐怖啦！

Manager不是这么得容易咯。:(

星期三 07/12/2011

一大早就爬起身到学校去准备。

靠！被老师骂。:(

当然，我也有被称赞的时候。嘻嘻。;)

Serve完客人后，我们就结束了这个term的餐厅管理课。

终于，松了一口气啊！:D

晚上在学校呆到整整凌晨才回宿舍去。

大家都在为第二天的Assignment presentation作准备。

我当然也要去尽一份责任咯！

星期四 08/12/2011

恐怖的一天来临了。花了整整两个月来做的肥皂盒assignment，是时候验收成果了。

很遗憾，我们的组很失败。:(

超级伤心咯。那时候真的有一种想哭的冲动，很天啊！:(

当我被评审们问到哑口无言的时候，我真的很想去跳湖！！！D;

算了，心情整个down掉。该死的！

结束后就回家去。呼呼大睡了好几个小时。

其实我是想把内疚感给忘掉，很辛苦。:(

没有做到最好，那感觉很辛苦。

星期五 09/12/2011

考试考试考试。不会做不会做不会做。

去跳湖算了！

等下clubbing去。烦！

Doubt.

I start missing the ex.

I'm thinking if I should give him an extra chance since we haven't work out for it together.

I'm thinking, I'm wondering, I'm doubting.

I don't know.

It just happens naturally, everytime after club.

Time, please lead me to the right way.

Good nights!

MUSICOFTHEDAYYY

The answer.

Hello December !

Time does fly, I even didn't realize that today already come to 1st of December.

It seems like I'm always spending my time with those unnecessary thingy.

I don't know what I've done within November. My mind can't think any single thing that I've done right.

The feeling is scary. It's just like I'm so useless.

I hate that, but what to do ?

I got no more energy, tiring, very tiring.

Uni life ain't easy.

Almost everyday I'm dying with assignments.

Thinking Skill, Food & Beverage , Malaysian Studies , Accounting and so on.

I'm not a superwoman, I can't take it.

I knew, all these are just some obstacles in life.

I must go through it, it's a must. For mum, dad, or even for myself.

Crapping like I don't know what I am talking about.

I lost my way, my direction. Start doubting, wondering what to do next.

Nostalgic ? Noooo. We must look forward isn't it ?

Yes, we must.

Oh well, as I said in the previous post, I'm done with the 9th.

But still, I can feel the pressure from him.

The feeling is just so tiring and I really don't want to take it anymore.

Know what ? I always feel that I'm under his control.

I don't know. Maybe yes, maybe no.

I need some time to do my stuff, to settle my assignments, to hang out with my friends, to club for relax, to study for exam, to get ready for assessment or whatsoever.

But you know, he's like keep wanna stick together with me and want me to spend all my time with him.

I can't, I just can't, that's why I feel I'm wasting time, that's why my time ain't enough.

Even when I'm doing discussion in campus, he still wants to come just for sitting beside.

I don't know why.

That's our main problem I think. He doesn't understand me well.

I need someone who can understand me.

Yeah, we still contacting, like normal.

But the feeling is gone. No more love, just friendship.

I want to treat him as a friend, the one who I most appreciate.

I'm a failure. After failed in 9 times of relationship, I just realize that I'm a failure.

Yes, I'm a weirdo, but I don't care cause that's me.

Actually, there's someone that I crushed on now. *OPPPS! Let's call him Mr.M.*

M stands for mystery. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

But still, I'm controlling myself for not falling for him.

No way.

'I seriously scare that I will fall in love with you.'LOL.

'So ? Love then love laa. Why so scare ?'

'Cause I hate you.'LOL.

'I hate you too.'

That day when I broke up, thanks him for staying with me whole night.

If not, I think I'm going to mentally breakdown. :(

I don't know, he's just so sweet everytime when he's with me.

We used to chat all the secrets together. Laugh and hit each other like we're kids.

I hate him for treating me so good.

I hate him for asking me not to leave him.

I hate him for telling me he loves me cause I am who I am.

I hate him for hugging me so tight when I cry.

I hate him for listening to me even though I keep scolding bad words to him.

I hate him for being so sweet to me.

Sorry William Ang, I'm the one who did wrong for this time.

I rather you hate me than you keep telling me that you love me.

Sorry.